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Hilarious Humor
God Appears as a Wet Blanket to Lecture About Law and Order
Florida Celebrates Diversity by Changing Nickname to ‘America’s Wang’
The Congo Sends Troops, Witch Doctors to U.S. to Restore Order
Mississippi Legislature Votes to Shorten State Name to Mipipi
Feminist Gloria Steinem Proposes New Law Eliminating ‘Men’ from Women
God Appears as a Gigantic Chocolate Bunny to Rant Against Gluttony
Texas Farmer Ignores Warnings, Looks Gift Horse in the Mouth
Hormel to Court Millennials with New Spam-Flavored Vegan Drink
Newborn Baby Complains About ‘Shit Show World’ Shortly After Birth
God Appears as a Giant Smokestack to Vent About Climate Change
Noted Author Predicts ‘Trump’ Will Be 2020’s Most Popular Baby Name
God Appears as Tick-Infested Cat to Lecture Americans About Health Care
Vegan Society Deems Frog a ‘Green’ Source of Protein
American Egg Board Warns Americans Not to Eat Eggs
Millennial Surprised to Learn ‘Douchebag’ Really Is a Thing
Dog Arrested for Public Urination on School Grounds
5 Good Reasons to Absolutely Hate the Pillsbury Doughboy
Mozambique and Swaziland Battle Over Whose Flag Is Stupider
Aunt Bee Was the Sexiest Woman in Television History
Report: KFC, (Expletive Deleted) PETA Settle Class Action Lawsuit
The Most Disturbing Advertising Mascots You’ve Ever Seen
The Most Whiny-Yet-Lovable Characters in Television and Movie History
Lessons the Lion King Can Teach Us
Silly Sports
Release the Sea Cups! Five Rejected Seattle Kraken Team Names
NFL Passes Rule Replacing Most Penalties With Fatherly Advice
‘Kars 4 Kids’ and ‘My Hiney’s Clean’ to Headline Super Bowl Halftime Show
Astros, Nationals Apologize for Crappy World Series Matchup
American Licorice Buys Washington Redskins, Renames Team ‘Red Vines’
Let the Good Times Roll: NBA Players to Begin Wearing Roller Skates
Servais Vows to ‘Eat a Bug’ if Streaking Mariners Don’t Make the Playoffs
NFL Owners Approve Half-Point Scoring Plays for the 2020 Season
Seattle Sneeze to Play in Alka-Seltzer Plus Night Cold Formula Park
Seattle’s New NHL Team to Be Named ‘Sneeze’
Rams to Move to St. Louis During Halftime of Super Bowl LIII Loss
Seattle Seahawks Boost Playoff Chances, Sign Ex-NBA Star Shaquille O’Neal
Entertaining Economics
God Appears as an Effeminate Bear to Preach About Income Inequality
Trump Calls for ‘Big, Beautiful Bankruptcy’ to Eliminate the National Debt
Vindman: Trump Obsessed With Dong During US-North Korea Summit
Trump Blasts Fed for Cutting Interest Rates: ‘Even Don Jr. Isn’t That Dumb’
U.S. Geological Survey Terminates Search for Fiscal Cliff
Mirthful Movies
RNC to Conclude With ‘Person, Woman, Man, Camera, TV: The Musical’
Trump Sons to Star in Live-Action ‘Beavis and Butt-Head’ Movie
Trump Orders ‘Outbreak’ Star Dustin Hoffman to Save the Nation
CNN Officially Changes Name to Coronavirus News Network
Vowing to Stop Bernie Sanders, Rachel Maddow Joins Fox News
Catfight! ‘Cats’ Stars Hiss and Claw at Security After Failing to Win Oscar
‘The Walking Dead’ to Include ‘Tasteful’ Zombie Sex in Future Episodes
Review: ‘Knives Out’ Is the Worst Bond Movie Ever Made
Universal Studios Cancels Next Seven ‘Jurassic World’ Sequels
Paramount Pictures Announces Nathan Lane Will Play the Next Terminator
5 Universal Principles Totally Busted By Hollywood
‘Groundhog Day’ Sequel ‘Yesterday’ Could Have Used a Large Squirrel
102-Year-Old Kirk Douglas to Star in next Five ‘Indiana Jones’ Sequels
George R.R. Martin Blames ‘Wine and Whores’ for Game of Thrones Typos
‘The Shawshank Redemption’ to Reboot as Late-Night Religious Program
Review: Netflix Nature Documentary ‘Bird Box’ Is a Fluttering Failure
The Greatest Movie Quotes You Probably Don’t Know
Ron Howard, Tom Hanks to Reunite in ‘Apollo 13’ Comedic Remake
Actor Christian Bale Observed ‘Aggressively Smashing His Hands’ Following Vice Premiere
Review: ‘Zero Dark Thirty’ Shoots Blanks As a Modern Romantic Comedy
Arnold Schwarzenegger Reportedly Obsessed With Actress Linda Hamilton in 1984
Priceless Politics
President Trump Files Lawsuit Against His Own Campaign
If Re-Elected, Trump Promises to Govern From White House Bunker
Trump Threatens to Lose Election if People Don’t Start Liking Him
Vice President Pence Denies That He’s a Big Piece of Crap
Adopting Biden’s Upbeat Tack, Network News ‘Positive’ Trump Is a Clown
New York Times: Trump Tax Return Losses ‘Mostly Cheeseburgers’
After Supreme Court Flip-Flop, Lindsey Graham’s Balls Pass Away
Former Trump Pseudonyms to Publish ‘October Surprise’ Tell-All Book
Trump Administration to Rename Electoral College ‘Trump University’
Steve Bannon Granted Bail After Agreeing to Bathe Before Trial
MyPillow Guy Tapped to Serve as America’s First MyChinaVirus Guy
WH Source: Kamala Harris Will Be a ‘Total Disaster’ as Vice President
Trump Proposes Delaying Election Until ‘Statue of Limitations’ Expires
Trump Boasts He Aced ‘Goodnight Moon’ to Fox’s Chris Wallace
Social Distancing Republicans Vow Not to Touch Trump With 10-Foot Pole
Trump Calls the Lincoln Project ‘Lyin’ Lincoln’ in Disastrous Fox Interview
Trump Claims Victory Over Coronavirus After Declaring War on Bats
Biden Promises to Select a Gender-Fluid Dog as First Pet
Trump Orders CDC to Use Windex to Stop the Spread of Coronavirus
Elizabeth Warren Drops Out of 2020 Race, Endorses Chief Standing Bear
Sen. Murkowski Hands Trump Her Balls During White House Ceremony
Robotic Democratic Candidate Andrew Yang Denies He’s Actually a Robot
Cory Booker Blames Low Poll Numbers on His ‘Boy Band’ Name
Trump Declares War on Clean Energy, Threatens to Break Wind
President Trump Insists ‘Imcheapment’ Is a Congressional Fiscal Award
Man Rushes to Doctor After Starting to ‘Feel the Bern’ at a Sanders Rally
Source: Emotional Trump Begs Kim Jong Un Not to End Affair
Devin Nunes’ Cow Calls the GOP Congressman a ‘Gullibull Nincowpoop’
Rudy Giuliani Named People Magazine’s ‘Sexiest Crazy SOB Alive’
God Addresses Nation as Trump Baby Blimp to Rail Against Corruption
Pence Seeks Conversion Therapy After Shaking Hands with Mayor Pete
Touting ‘Air Force One’ Credentials, Harrison Ford to Run for President
AG Barr Launches Investigation of Investigation of Russia Investigation
Giuliani Tells FBI That Russian Prostitutes Leaked on Trump
Trump Fires Back, Orders AG Barr to Impeach ‘Loser’ House Democrats
Sen. Sanders Stuns Debate Moderators: ‘You’re Throwing Your Vote Away’
Incognito Trump Asked Country Bumpkin to Explain Tariffs to Him (Video)
President Trump’s iPhone Finally Commits Suicide
Eric and Don Jr. Argue Over Which Trump Son Is Dumber
God Blasts ‘Thoughts and Prayers’ Shooting Response at Florida Chic-fil-A
Joe Biden: ‘I Will Slather Myself in Obama if You Make Me Your President’
Trump Reveals Nicknames for Every Democratic Presidential Candidate
Joe Biden Tells CNN He Needs to Do More Than Smile and Babble
Dem Debate, Night 2: Candidates Give Each Other Trump-Like Nicknames
Stephanopoulos Interview: Trump Claims Uranus Is Part of the Moon
Trump’s ‘Secret’ Deal with Mexico: Taco Bell to Offer Big Mac Sandwiches
Vice President Pence Calls for ‘Dotard’ Trump’s Impeachment
The Lucky Rock’s Transcript of the Trump-Abe Golf Outing
Alabama State Legislature Passes Measure Protecting the Unejaculated
Trump Mocks ‘Stupidhead Joe’ Biden at Campaign Rally
Trump Maintains He Said ‘I’m Glucked’ in Incendiary Mueller Report Quote
Trump Administration to Redact Over 99% of ‘Duller Report’
The Lucky Rock’s Exclusive Interview with Senator Bernie Sanders
Trump Proposes Technology Panel of Tim Apple, Bill Microsoft and Mark Facebook
Bernie Sanders Enters Presidential Race, Mulls Betty White as VP
Taco Bell Closes 16 Locations; Trump Declares National Emergency
The Lucky Rock’s Exclusive Interview with President Trump
Elizabeth Warren Claims She Meant to Identify as ‘American Indianan’
Border Wall Breakthrough: Dems Double Offer to $2
Trump Offers New Slogan to Pelosi: “Build the Fence & I’ll Dump Mike Pence”
Exclusive: Putin Orders Trump to Change His Name
WH Sources: Trump Concerned Dems May Be Wrong About Border Wall
Shutdown Update: Dems, GOP ‘Make Hay’ with Wall
Trump Accuses Democratic Leadership of Racism Against Poles
President Trump Enjoys 100% Popularity in New Poll
Trump Plans Switch to Metric System to End Global Warming
Trump Proposes Selling Hawaii, New Mexico to Saudi Arabia
Side-Splitting Science (and Nature)
Covid-19 Jumps Species, Infects Trump Adviser Stephen Miller
Mars Issues U.S. Travel Ban and Requests Not to Be Taken to Our Leader
CDC Adds Star Wars Costumes to List of Approved Coronavirus Defenses
Planet of the Apes? Biologist Says Human Evolution Is ‘Wildly’ in Reverse
Mnuchin Says Space Force to Evacuate Millions of Americans to Wyoming
Paleontologists Agree Most Dinosaurs Tasted Delicious
New Evidence Proves Humans Evolved from Horses
State of Emergency Declared in Alabama after Hurricane Dorian ‘Disaster’
Scientists Discover New Subhuman Species: Homo Mitchis McConnell
Research Concludes Dogs Dream About Playing Poker
Hurricane Cap’n Crunch? Weather Service to Sell Storm Sponsorships
NASA Chief Makes Ass of Himself During Uranus Presentation
Fun and Unusual Pets the Whole Family Can Avoid
Breaking News: NASA’s Curiosity Rover Discovers Dirt on Mars
NASA’s Cheyenne Probe to Determine if Intelligent Life Exists on Wyoming.
NASA’s InSight Lander Confirms Mars ‘Sucks’
How to Make Your Pet More Interesting
Serious Stuff
The Antlion: Doodlebug, Doodlebug, Come out of Your Hole
You, Inc.: Treat Your Personal Finances Like a Business
Exoplanets: A Quadrillion Points of Light
I’m the Only Man in America Who Predicted the Mariners Would Be Good
Interest Rates and the Economy: Real Yields Have Curves
No, National Media, the Mariners Are Not Rebuilding
Signs Your Small Business is Heading Toward a Financial Iceberg
Hilarious Humor
Silly Sports
Entertaining Economics
Mirthful Movies
Priceless Politics
Side-Splitting Science (and Nature)
Serious Stuff
Hilarious Humor
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