Tag: Arnold Schwartzegger

Pence Seeks Conversion Therapy After Shaking Hands with Mayor Pete

Mike Pence checked into a conversion therapy clinic shortly after shaking Mayor Pete Buttieg’s hand at a South Bend black tie event, The Lucky Rock has learned. “It was the damnedest thing,” said Buttigieg. “We both attended a Kars 4 Kids charity dinner last month, and naturally, we ran into one another. I said something along […]

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Paramount Pictures Announces Nathan Lane Will Play the Next Terminator

Hasta la vista, Arnie. In a tersely-worded statement, Paramount Pictures announced that it has “immediately and forever” severed ties with Terminator star Arnold Schwartzenegger. To replace him, the studio has hired veteran character actor Nathan Lane. “Arnold Schwartzenegger will no longer be the Terminator,” confirmed spokesperson Sarah Grant. “He played the character far too aggressively and […]

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