Tag: Dana Bash

Sen. Murkowski Hands Trump Her Balls During White House Ceremony

On Saturday, Alaska Senator Lisa Murkowski officially handed her balls to Donald Trump during a White House ceremony, multiple sources have reported. “You’ve performed a great service for your country,” said the president, gratefully accepting Murkowski’s balls. “The Republican party has never, ever been more unified, believe me!” I have never seen the Republican Party […]

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Joe Biden: ‘I Will Slather Myself in Obama if You Make Me Your President’

Day two of the Democratic debates saw a feisty Joe Biden work to overcome his lackluster performance from the previous debate. Not only did mention Barack Obama at every turn, but Biden went a step further by promising to ‘slather’ himself in the former president from this point forward. “Look, I know everyone here would […]

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