Joe Biden Tells CNN He Needs to Do More Than Smile and Babble

In a recent CNN interview, Joe Biden confirmed that his pathway to the presidency will likely involve more than crooked grins and incoherent babbling. “I probably need to do more,” Biden replied after CNN’s Chris Cuomo asked if looking presidential would be enough. “You’ve got to admit that I sure do look like a president, though,” […]

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Dem Debate, Night 2: Candidates Give Each Other Trump-Like Nicknames

Night two of the Democratic debates started cordially, but deteriorated quickly as the candidates began shouting insults at one another. Ultimately, they handed the GOP a political gift by snarkily giving each other Trump-style nicknames. “I have to say, it was beyond surreal,” said NBC Nightly News anchor Lester Holt. “The spell President Trump has […]

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Alabama State Legislature Passes Measure Protecting the Unejaculated

After passing the nation’s most extreme anti-abortion law, the Alabama legislature doubled down on Wednesday, outlawing ‘fun’ sex. Per the new law, the release of spermatozoa without the intent to conceive will be a Class C felony, punishable by five years in prison. The bill was signed into law by Governor Kay Ivey and went […]

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Trump Mocks ‘Stupidhead Joe’ Biden at Campaign Rally

Shortly after the entrance of Joe Biden into the 2020 presidential race, President Trump wasted no time welcoming him into the fray: Welcome to the race Sleepy Joe. I only hope you have the intelligence, long in doubt, to wage a successful primary campaign. It will be nasty – you will be dealing with people […]

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