Immediately following the latest Democratic debate, Joe Biden made another promise likely to dramatically improve his standing with a key voting bloc: Millennials. “Number one, as I said during the debate, I’ll choose a woman as vice president,” Biden reiterated during an impromptu press conference. Shaking his fist, he vowed, “I’ll do it, dad gummit, […]
Read More Biden Promises to Select a Gender-Fluid Dog as First PetAcknowledging the growing popularity of veganism, Hormel announced it will soon introduce a Spam-flavored drink called Sham. According to a company spokesperson, Sham will marry the flavor of Spam with vegan ingredients and pour like a ‘chunky, runny milkshake’. Shake plus Spam equals Sham Hormel Foods Director of Marketing Amy Sand acknowledged the 82-year old […]
Read More Hormel to Court Millennials with New Spam-Flavored Vegan DrinkKentucky Fried Chicken began as a depression-era roadside restaurant serving Colonel Harland Sanders‘ famously-seasoned fried chicken. The Trump-before-Trump Sanders would be the one suffering from depression were he still alive, as the fast food giant has agreed to a divestiture of chicken-related assets to settle a $100 million class action lawsuit. Over the next two […]
Read More Report: KFC, (Expletive Deleted) PETA Settle Class Action Lawsuit
